So, I'm watching last season of Join or Die with Craig Ferguson and it's the episode about cult leaders. Craig said something about the problems that arise from people being so certain that they were right and everyone else was wrong. I think it was the word certainty that got my attention because that's what I remember praying for when I was a teenager. That was the word I used.
I remember being scared and worried and not knowing what to do. I was very smugly told by several people that I should pray about it, and teenage me did. I prayed to be made certain of what I should do and what I should believe. I needed a sign, just something to convince me that I was on the right track and that I didn't have to be so afraid.
I never got one, but I did get older and saw more things and met more people and it started to occur to me that the people who had been so sure of themselves when I was younger were definitely afraid of something. They wouldn't look at certain things, or talk about them, or even acknowledge that such things existed somewhere in the world. This time, I was more-severely-than-smugly told that they would pray for me.
I remember being scared and worried and not knowing what to do. I was very smugly told by several people that I should pray about it, and teenage me did. I prayed to be made certain of what I should do and what I should believe. I needed a sign, just something to convince me that I was on the right track and that I didn't have to be so afraid.
I never got one, but I did get older and saw more things and met more people and it started to occur to me that the people who had been so sure of themselves when I was younger were definitely afraid of something. They wouldn't look at certain things, or talk about them, or even acknowledge that such things existed somewhere in the world. This time, I was more-severely-than-smugly told that they would pray for me.
- Current Mood:
nostalgic
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